If You Forget Me by Pablo Neruda
I want you to know
one thing.
You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.
Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.
If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.
If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.
But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine
April 26, 2012
April 18, 2012
Celebrating “Pohela Boishak 1419” and Bringing Bengali Culture Live on Stage: by University Malaya Bengali Students Community!
April 12, 2012
...what goes around it comes around...
April 10, 2012
... Sleepless In KL ...
aauf...a sleepless night...have a big day to pass. Um... and I miss my room. Its been raining for almost 2hours now. spent the entire night talking to different people and I enjoyed it. Life isn't that bad you know ... more on that believing to survival efforts and breathing on own terms is worth living such hell of a life. Though I am feeling very sleepy...but I cant.. I feel like not going to the class today .. maybe I will skip it. I just wanna spend the day talking and talking. someone told me in FB - Happiness is good health and a bad (short) memory..the most unhappy mind is one that happens to think the most...that takes life too seriously, at its basest... and he told me - "perhaps u let urself be moved by anything that happens around, cry over anything that doesn’t go by ur line of thinking or expectation…but I think that one becomes happy only when one starts to expect less from life, from people who matter and who who do not…" ... he is just a FB friend... and i replied with - I am ok this way amr happy thakte valo lage naa u kno i get bored when everything happens my way i get bored of laughing and smiling i get bored of having a perfect life i like problems I am more content such way.. attention seeker.. drama queen.. getting sympathy of others and he came up with that's the truest confession he heard or whatever - ahahaha.. but its true.. maybe lately my incompleteness and self-lacking criteria has made me act like such... what to do ?? leave me or live without me.. its takes alot to stick to someone like me who is unstable & unpredictable in life. when where why my heart falls and breaks I don't keep track of it.. sometimes I wonder from why has Allah gifted me with such charm of loving so easily and demanding such hugely and giving such less.. once one of my x's told me that I love torturing myself and others and I enjoy that. and I think I do. now that makes me a bad person. now what to do? leave me or live with me.. I am already created and established that way... very confusing?? I guess its the dizziness. well - Inshallah may the day be good.. and all be safe.. I think I will write another one today ... as I am too tired to concentrate on actually what i intended to write ... :( cheers!
April 09, 2012
... another day another fight ...
aww.. yes ... I am still breathing :D today while sleeping for a while I felt I am back in my home and could my mother shouting... well she has a loud voice and back home i used wake up hearing her most days. but no... someone in the dorm corridor was shouting.. sigh i miss u amma ... one of the prettiest ladies i have ever seen :P
Well... here is a sunny day in KL today but the sky is making huge music - meaning the thunder sounds, seems its going to rain soon ... did I ever said that UMA nature made me fell in love with nature actually? Yes... after Cox's ... Its UMA - the place i love the most in the world. I am not much of a traveller or a nature lover - but I adore watching the beauties of trees and bushes and empty roads and highland-marks here... Staring at the empty environment full of greenery makes me go green LOL..
aah... its our Bengali New Year next week and we the Bengali students are hosting a event on the night of 13th :D :D and I am going to sing with my tune-less dramatic horrible voice in it... being a foreigner is a blessing at times .. no-matter how bad i perform I will wont be cursed ! more I will get sympathy and as most wont understand what we will be singing so less critics ! ahahaha... OK... I have got a class to catch in 2 hours.. I just finished up my one-entire week vacation and I am feeling like I don't want to go. I sleep alot less than I used to in BD... maybe max 4-6hours normally and sometimes by miracle 8hours max. at-least once a week. I believe when I will go back to BD in my vacation i will first sleep a whole week 12-16 hours and then do other works... oh no... its raining ... gosh ! I hate carrying the umbrella!!! huh!
So, as I am unwillingly on my way to spend the rest of the days with my class or whatever - I wish all a very good day and May Allah bless us with safety ...
p.s - life isn't always that we want it to be...its upto us whether we can be the way life requires us to be .. Cheers!
April 08, 2012
Officialy Once agaiN I am singLe...
but 1st time in life not ready to mingLe... lol .. after-all whatever happens ... happens for good.. lately i felt its better to stay alone ... than to be with someone and still feel lonely ... and it made me terrible to force someone to keep loving me...and my ultimate realization is LoVe isnt about being together all the time ...it also means being apart and still praying for the betterment of the person we love... tada ! Soi Is Acting Like a Grown-UP .. congratulations Soi ! Ok... I am back after so many months... let me give some info on myself ... weLL ... I am currently in Kuala-Lumpur .. doing my masters in Development Studies ... exact 2 months away from Bangladesh .. I am content .. had rough pitches lately .. and Yes Hell Yea I am moving On...
By now You know .. I am a contradictory person with my emotional-vague-obsessed self-deduction ! I am 25+ and I sometimes still manage to act like sweet 16...lol I am crazy and my own Favorited-selfish BraT! I miss my country-friends-family more than ever .. and life here in KL isnt worse ... I mean yea its bad at times .. But I am learning to stick to it as time is passing by.
Life here is nothing like Bangladesh ... sometimes i feel as if i am some kinda alien here ... sometimes others are to me. But life is always moving on .. on and on ... Now when I did i fell in love again?? just a month ... as I am a universal lover ... and i Love being in Love .. it just happened.. let me tell you - when you love someone - never expect that they will love you the same way you do.. its all about being patient .. attraction .. trust .. compromises and understanding ...
as just in a month he has made me forgotten about my mistakes..scars..past memories which used to haunt me down to hell .. and as far as his concern ... doesn't matter what i feel... strange huh?? Einsteinian statement refers to if you don't believe in mysteries or magic's that means you aint alive ... I have always gone to Love .. but this time love came to me.. and it faded itself from the other person .. and forcing someone to be in love with you - aah no - that's something Soi is never comfortable with .. but I did that !!!because Love sets you free .. when in need .. it shows you how compassionately you can love someone and at the same time you cant have him .. so I guess Once more as always - Allah Is Doing What is right for ME... what else??? I have decided to be regularly writing from now on ... though i cant write but i will honestly give it another try... why ??? because I want to .. duh ! lol.. Its never too late to accept own lacking... minding own limitations and still be happy about what we are ... cheers!
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