After couple of months break in writing - in past few days - i have been writing on my mind thoughts that i couldn't finish - so i am back with bit of brainstorming issues that i do wonder about these days ...
# SLEEP !
sleep is such a habit which does make me feel tiring - deosnt matter i sleep less or more - i hardly have a fresh feeling and its alarming ! when a person is happy - or maybe atleast satisfaction is there in mind - the sleep is supposed to be pleasurable ... to different people the pursuit of happiness is different - to me mostly its a good sleep ! If i am able to sleep sound and tight - I am content ! sigh - i am back with sleeping problems and it does make me worries often ! i am not into sleeping pills and pills are never a permanent solution to sleeping disorder - my own realization !
# RelationshiP !
being with someone is surely a happy moment - whether its ur father or your boyfriend ... your nieces or or ur friends ... each relation is valuable in terms of passionate devotion ... but at the end of the day - the best relation of all is the relation with ur creator and with urself ... the clarity and purity of own conscience is eventually the key to stay human ... how much of that am i getting? hmm - confusion and dissatisfaction !
# silence within soul !
i have become reaction-less - i was though before - but now it worries me ... i am observant of things happening around - still my senses have come to this what-so-ever state - where i have become this self-obsessed creature with less to want from the world and others ... self -obsession is nothing new in my case - but being silent is something i am worried about !
# Friends do Change !
whether its me or someone else - as time passes by the feelings do change - in negative-ness of miss-communication or from the positivism of betterment for the future - acceptance of the practical enhancement of reality . some do accept that and ignores the changes and pretend being same balancing the conjugational process of life-living-career-ambitions-family extensions-facebook bla bla ! some never accepts it and complains about it - and fails to balance in-between and is left out all alone !
# its ok to be faulty and wrong but not worth being called superlative !
i am a person of justified mistakes - well i am not proud of that but i do take pride in it ! when people points at me saying i am this i am that - i should correct and i should stop - i ask myself - why dont i think like that for myself? is it because i lack the level of understanding of right and wrong? is it because i have evil within my soul and a bad person? what am i ? stupid dumb who doesnt want ownself to see happy? whats wrong in being stupid? isnt this what was written in my destiny? i made mistakes and god made me paid for them - and still theres more to pay for - what if i choose that for myself? this does occur into great deal in me ! every coin has 2 faces ... in my opinion every issue has different meaning to explain to explore to conclude.
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